BREAKING: O.J. Simpson paroled ‘I’ve done my time’

After nine years in a Nevada prison, O.J. Simpson has been paroled. Not for the crime for which he’s famous.

The LA Times reported Thursday:

The state board went into recess late Thursday morning after hearing more than an hour of testimony from Simpson, his oldest daughter, Arnelle Simpson, and Frumong, who each asked for Simpson’s release. The panel returned about a half our later and unanimously voted to grant parole.

During his hearing, Simpson testified that he’s not a violent person, delivering the whopper of all whoppers:

“I’m in no danger to pull a gun on anybody. I’ve never been accused of it,” he said. “Nobody has ever accused me of pulling any weapon on them.”

I suppose that little matter in 1994 of a trial for murder, with his wife Nicole Brown Simpson and Ron Goldman lying dead of stab wounds wasn’t on Simpson’s mind.

Simpson, wearing standard-issue blue jeans, blue button-down shirt and a white T-shirt, now has close-cropped gray hair, and he looked slightly stiff as he sat down at a plain wooden table inside a prison five miles outside the town of Lovelock, Nev., where he has served nine years in prison for a robbery and kidnapping conviction in 2008.

CNN reported Simpson’s plea to the parole board as a model prisoner.

“I’ve done my time,” he said. “I’ve done it as well and as respectfully as I think anyone can.”

Personally, I think the author of “If I Did It,” did it. Personally, I think nine years is woefully inadequate for an unrepentant man who did what I believe he did. But America’s justice system doesn’t allow for what I think (which is a good thing).

Arguably, this prison stint, over a conviction stemming from a Las Vegas armed robbery attempt to steal memorabilia from his football career (remember, he was a football player?), may be related to his acquittal from the murder charges. He lost a civil suit from the Brown family, which bankrupted him, and he resorted to hawking goods instead of making famous luggage commercials.

Now he’s free again to do whatever 70-year-old ex-con, ex-athletes do.

Sadly, because this is O.J. Simpson, it will get more media coverage that it deserves. I wish Simpson a good rest of his life, preferably away from me or anyone I care about. I wish him peace, the peace that comes from unburdening the soul (not in hypothetical book chapters).

Mostly I just wish him away.

Steve Berman


Editor of The New Americana. God, family, and country, in that order. With the exception of God, the other two cannot prosper without a firm belief in all three.

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